Stay up with me, don't fall asleep

This Lent has gone by so fast, and I can't believe we are in Holy Week.

I don't feel like I've done my due this Lent, like I've suffered enough to witness the Resurrection. Am I am the one who decides what I suffer? Am I the one who doles our mercy and grace and forgiveness? Thankfully, no.

So, does it matter what I feel like?

I suppose not.

But I keep falling into the same habits, or tenancies dressed up as habits that are actually sins.

I suppose that is my suffering, as I enter into Holy Week. The Lord is stripping away some things, and showing me myself, which is a whole lot of fun, let me tell you.

I look at myself, I look at who I am, and I am glad that I am not the one who doles out mercy, and grace, and forgiveness.

For I am little and very far from Sainthood.