Trusted

Dear Jesus,

Yesterday, I woke up and prayed the rosary. Sure.

But in every prayer I have been begging you for the same thing, asking, praying, wishing.

And I never asked, "Lord, what do you want in this?"

And I never said, "Lord, I trust you in this."

I just told you all the things I wanted, all the things I think I need, all the things I wish would happen.

I skipped the time I usually block out to listen, and instead just listed what I wanted.

I look up at the picture of you that I have on my wall and I am reminded of something. You can be trusted.

You can be trusted in the dark and sad and the hard. You can be trusted in the light and happiness and joy. You can be trusted when there are no answers and when the answers are not what I want to hear. You can be trusted with time, when I want it to be on my timetable. You can be trusted when the mornings are hard and when the mornings are filled with sunlight. You can be trusted.

Jesus, I asked. I asked, and I am confident that you will do what is best.

And right now, I know, what you want is for me to just wait, and to just trust.

That's really hard but...You, my Jesus, you can be trusted.